Friday, July 15, 2011

Kiwi Quirks enjoyed by an SA Ex-Pat.

      
   
'As Quirky as Kiwi'                                                   


 Eve Hemming

Exactly three years later and I’m still alive, well and living in New Zealand. (The Maori name is Aotearoa ). Auckland, where I live, is a sprawling city where almost half the entire country’s population reside. Auckie’s a ‘global village’ in its own right, with inhabitants from many cultural backgrounds calling it ‘home’.














This gives one the latitude to express one’s own identity, with the full spectrum from conservative & conventional through to more‘off the wall’. Anything goes regarding hair length. It can be regular through to dreadlocks and ponytails or bald with a long beard for blokes; and blokes like wearing caps and beanies, too. Women enjoy wearing layers, especially in cold weather and they refer to any new colour range as 'the new black'.  Kiwis are also tattoo mad !







Kids, too, are permitted some imaginative latitude. And quite a few junior schools are civvy schools.
  



The ‘pants off the ground’ adolescent boys’ style does not cut it for this gran! But some of the fashions are divine. Makes me want to be A SASSY 20 again ! Though I still enjoy my bit of 'mature flair' and love fingerless gloves in the Winter!   


  NZ is bound by The Treaty of Waitangi, which makes it unique with a Bi-cultural society – defined by Maori and everyone else, (referred to as ‘The Crown’); the majority being Pakeha (NZ Europeans), Pasifikas (People who hail from the Pacific Islands) or Asian. One soon learns to assimilate Maori words, phrases and customs into one’s repertoire. One has a powhiri when inducted into an organisation and meetings commence and end with a karakia or a waita (prayer or song). 

In the same way that others can’t always understand how we South Africans tick; one can’t always fathom the Kiwi head space. Kiwis seem to have paradoxical persona's – some seem quite reserved, and others have an outrageous sense of humour. One area where we can all take a leaf from the Kiwi’s book is their unprejudiced stance about disability, or anything unusual from the norm. Kiwis are PC, big -hearted, generous and compassionate. There’re always exceptions to the rule, but these are the Kiwis I’ve seen and worked with. This also applies to the education system, where many children with disabilities are accommodated in mainstream schools (Inclusive Education). We can also all take a leaf out of their book about DIY, hard work at the 'coal face', equity and egalitarianism. Women drive buses and operate forklifts and the ‘postie’ could well be married to a brain surgeon. Also people often refer to their spouse as 'my partner'... which can be pretty confusing pertaining to the gender of the partner. 
Ensuring that a country of only 4.5 million functions highly efficiently, every i has to be dotted, every t crossed and every $ accounted for. Kiwis are strict on safety regulations - one can’t staple together a parcel, as it could hurt the ‘postie’s’ fingers, and tough blokes wear earmuffs when operating anything from a lawnmower to massive machinery. There is also ZERO tolerance about rule breaking.
The lingo still entertains and baffles me. You 'shout' a mate a coffee and you 'gift' someone. If you’re comical, you’re called a ‘dag’. ‘Naff off’ is get lost, ‘flash’ is good and a ‘hissy fit’ is a tantrum, while ‘get off the grass’ means stop pulling my leg! If you’re happy, you’re ‘a box of birds’, an idiot fast driver is a ‘hoon’ and anything awesome is ‘sweet as’. And you never say goodbye, just ‘see ya later’ - even to strangers. 


And best not to ‘root’ for anyone. It has a sexual connotation I discovered the other day.
Kiwi adverts are raunchy and hilarious from 'Novis show us your crack' for a cracked windscreen advert to 'Miss Muffet's revenge' and 'Bugger off' for spider and bug repellant. A company that has a battery charging rescue vehicle is called 'Jump Me' and a notable golf club's advert is 'Come and wack your balls...'
Kiwis love tattoos, motorbikes, wine and beer, extreme cars with immense engines and exhaust pipes, rugby, netball and coffee. There’s a ‘coffee to go’ on every corner. They’re self-confessed coffee gourmets with a vast array to choose from in small to giant soup- bowl sized. Kiwis also love personalised number plates and it entertains me every day. One car number plate surprised me - it said
 ' Hi Jack'.


 Kiwis are animal mad. Dogs trail along to every park, beach or 
outdoor function, the owner taking a ‘poop bag’ along to scoop 
up any evidence. 


Last year they had a state funeral for Mocha, 
the amiable dolphin from Gisborne, 
who  used to frolic in the ocean with 
the locals. And recently they 
rescued ‘Happy Feet’ the 
Emperor Penguin, who has
been operated on and will 
be returned to the Antarctic
once he has 
fully rehabilitated.
Photo: Muriwai Beach Gannet Colony Sunset West Coast Auckland
Best Jogging Strollers


It’s astounding the way Kiwis go through winter; some in sandals and T shirts, while I’m donned in jacket and scarf. They’re fitness fanatics (Aside from the hefty ones and the smokers). You see parents jogging, pushing their toddlers in pushchairs though the drizzle. Come Summer, Kiwis go even wilder; embracing the elements, swimming, sharing fish and chips on the beach, sailing, and just celebrating a hundred ‘crazy as’ Kiwi ways. 

KIWI SLANG WORDS 


Aussie           Australian                         

jack up
to arrange something
across the ditch
Australia
kai
food (from the Maori word for eating)
biscuit
cookie
Kiwi
New Zealander
bloke
man
kiwi
NZ flightless native bird
brassed off
disappointed, annoyed
kiwi/kiwifruit
chinese gooseberry
chippie
potato chip
“ladies, a plate”
please bring a dish of food to share
chocka
full
long drop
outdoor toilet built over a hole in ground
cocky, cow-cocky
dairy farmer
mate
buddy, close friend
chook
chicken
metal road
a gravel road surface
college
high school
milo
hot chocolate drink
corker!
great!
motorway
freeway
crib
small holiday home in Southland
Nana
grandmother
crook
sick, poorly
nappy
diaper
dairy
mini supermarket / convenience store
OE
[acronym] Overseas Experience
dole
unemployment benefit
Oz
Australia
dreaded lurgy
cold or flu
pakeha
non-Maori person
ding
minor accident, car damage
pav
pavlova, NZ iconic dessert
gander
take a look
pudding
dessert
Godzone
New Zealand
pushing up daisies
dead/buried
flat stick, flat tack
as fast as possible
rough as guts
unpolished
flog
steal
shark and taties
fish and chips
fortnight
two consecutive weeks
she'll be right
everything will be ok
half pie
half heartedly, poorly performed
smoko
break, rest period
hangi
traditional Maori earth oven
suss
figure something out
hard case
joker, comedian, witty person
ute
utility vehicle, small pickup truck
hard yakka
hard work
whinge
complain
heaps
a lot
wobbly
throw a tantrum
hooray
goodbye
wop wops
isolated area of land
hottie



hot water bottle




3 comments:

  1. v interesting my cosmopolitan friend

    ReplyDelete
  2. Jill, it will be good to get Barry's take on this as he lived here for yonks ? Any angles I forgot and can still add ? lol X

    ReplyDelete